Empty Arms

I’ve been realizing that I have two hands again. I have just recently realized that my arms are empty. Sure Benny was walking and doing his own thing, but he was still getting picked up and held (mostly as I was chasing him or trying to get him off of something). I have arms that ache to hold my toddler.

I really miss that feeling, of having someone in my arms while trying to do a million other things, ‘octopus mom.’ I hate the fact that I have two hands to fill the dishwasher, or carry laundry up and down the stairs.

When I’m around other toddlers and babies I need my fix. I need to smell that baby smell, feel their soft skin and snuggle with their rolls. I cherish my time with Evie and Rory and every other little one that I’m so blessed to have in my life. I would carry Darcy around, but she’s too big now (which I hate).

I spent so much time looking forward to my kids being independent, that now that Darcy is, it sucks. She’s going into 1st Grade! Why must she grow up? I hate this.

Author: sheriroaf

Sheri Roaf is the mother of four wonderful children who turned to blogging after her 17 month old son Bennett passed away unexpectedly. Through her writing she has found a way to help herself and her family move forward in the face of tragedy. View all posts by sheriroaf