A Fletcher is one that makes arrows.  We named our Fletcher after my maiden name and Benny’s middle name, but I hadn’t given too much thought about the signifigance of the arrow until now.


It’s the new direction that our lives are taking.  I’ve forgotten how much love and joy my babies brought to my life over the last 19 months as I suffered with losing Benny.  We are truly blessed to have this new little man and I’m so in love.  He was born on June 23rd and came into this world screaming.  He kept screaming for the first hour of his life, inconsolable until dad started talking to him in the warmer.  He instantly recognized dads voice and calmed down.

With love comes grief as I look at this little guy who seems so familiar to me.  It’s hard because we keep calling him Benny out of habit, like any parent does with multiple children.  His personality is different in so many ways, yet so similar.

Of my 3, he is definitely the most needy, which is fine as I am needy for him too.  If I could hold him all day I would.  I’d forgotten about that bond, that deep mom/baby connection that happens.  It makes me miss Benny something so fierce while at the same time love this guy so much.  It’s a contradiction of emotions.

My arms may be full again, but there will always be a piece of my heart missing.

Author: sheriroaf

Sheri Roaf is the mother of four wonderful children who turned to blogging after her 17 month old son Bennett passed away unexpectedly. Through her writing she has found a way to help herself and her family move forward in the face of tragedy.

10 thoughts on “Fletcher”

  1. Sheri, you’ve written this so well. I can’t wait to meet the little guy. Hope he let’s you get some rest.


    1. We seem to be on track tonight, here’s to hoping! Can’t wait for you guys to get home! Miss you all lot’s!!! Hugs from the US!


  2. Such beautiful words coming from your heart Sheryl. You are allblessed with another gift from God. As you say your heart will
    always hold a special place for Bennett and always be with you everyday in spirit. I have a friend who lost their daughter 6 years
    ago when she was three what they do is when they have family
    photos taken they always hold up a picture of their Hailey in the
    mix of them. Enjoy your bundle of joy and God Bless you all.
    Looking forward to meeting Fletcher in July.


    1. Super excited for you too! You must be getting close now. Hopefully the weather out by you is cool throughout the rest of your pregnancy!


  3. What an absolutely beautiful baby boy. He look remarkably like the newborn pictures of Benny that you have shared. What a joy. My birthday is Jun 24th, we almost shared a bday. :). Congratulations endlessly. Xoxo

    Liked by 1 person

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